Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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What do you call a black man in jail Your dad

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I used to think skyrim jokes were funny. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

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What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

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A cat playing laser tag.

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

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What did the bartender say to the man? can i have a beer if you dont get it the bartender asked the customer for a beer

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A hispanic man eats a taco and enjoys. He is kicked in the nuts 2 months later.

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What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

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roses are blue violets are red heres a gun now your dead

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How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

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What's hard and orange on the outside, and squidgy in the middle? A tanned man's head

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why did the man get a divorce? Because his wife had an affair.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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What is small, naked and covered in sperm My son

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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What happened when the blind man reached for his soda? He picked it up, took a sip, and placed it back down where it was and continued with what he was doing.

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Q; How did the blind man cross the road? A; very unsuccessfully leaving behind memories of his joys but soon forgotten smile

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels.

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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Hatch! Hatchoo! Bless you!

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whats the differnece between a bag of dead babies and a ferarri? nothing ill never have either

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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