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Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

a, b, c, d, e, f, g, h, i, j, k, l, m, n, o, p, q, refrigerator.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nazi Nazi who? I am the mailman. I nazi your mailbox. Can I leave the letters on the front porch?

What is Colder than a witch's tit? Not much. It was removed for biopsy and kept in the pathology freezer. At absolute zero.

Yo mamas so ugly that when she looked out the window, she was arrested for mooning.

What did the dead baby say to horse? Nothing, it was dead

Roses are red vielots are blue but they aren't as sweet as you.Can you be my Valentine ny choclate cupcake will you me my choclate

Why was the phone wearing glasses? It lost its contacts!

Hi! This is Ms.McGruder you two boys in my office at 3:00 p.m. today

What colour are blackberries? Purple.

what do u call a man being beaten in the street the cops

How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

OMG I was sexting my friend and I accidentally sent my naked picture to my parents. What do I do? Tell your friend that you accidentally sent your naked picture to your parents.

How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

Yo momma's so fat that when she died of congestive heart failure, your family had to pay extra for a larger coffin to bury her in.

What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.

My name is Jeff

why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

What is black and white and red all over? A multi-racial orphan who has recently suffered a fatal stab wound to a major artery.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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