You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand. thats impossible, because nature says that ducks cannot walk.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, Everything is gray, I'm a dog.

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A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

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What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

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What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

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Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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Q. How did the blind man cross the road A. By an abmulance which took him to the hospital because his first attempt to cross was unsuccessful and the hospital was conventeintly located on the other side of the road.

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It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

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Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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What do you call a fish without an eye? Impaired of vision.

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Whats the difference between a Bicycle and a duck? They Both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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why did bob fall off the swing Because he got hit by a microwave

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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So I was walking down the road today

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What do you call something that lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, but that seems like an improbable circumstance.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

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What's the difference between a zit and a priest? These two things are so different that I couldn't list all of the differences in this text box.

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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