Patient- "Doctor, doctor help me! I've only got 59 seconds to live!" Doctor- "I'll be there in a minute."

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

Why doesnt mexico have an olympic team? Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim in already in america.

What's worse than an actual joke on anti-joke.com? Many things. Considering this is only one website among millions on the internet, and it really has no effect on what happens in the world, it really isn't a big deal in the grand scheme of life.

Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

What do you call a black man who is great at basketball? An all-star

Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

Why did the boy lose the race? Because he is morbidly obese.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he wants to drink. He orders a beer.

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

Knock Knock Who's there? ........

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven was black

A donkey looks at a goat. The goat walks away.

What did the Coke can say to the Pepsi can? Nothing it is a inanimate object and cannot speak.

What do you call an unfunny comment that demeans a group of people? Bigotry

19 roosters walk into a roller coaster

Why did the man hang himself? Because his pistol misfired.

Justin Bieber.

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

What did the paralyzed kid get for his 18th birthday? A boner.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Cause she's a woman

A man walks into a bar. Then he buys a beer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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