Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

Dear Diary, I am down to my last drops of water, I'm going to die soon. Wait, a man is offering me some water! Theres still hope, wait he said sike and ran off. I'm going to die alone.

2 girls talking to each other: brunette: Christmas is on Friday this year blonde: let's hope its not on Friday the 13th!!!!!

What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

Nope, but you know those like little stop motion things with clay figures? Plompsters or something?

Why are anti jokes so funny? Because they are not

Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing, they had just met and both were very shy.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? I lost my tractor!

Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

What do you call a Fat man? You call him by His name because that's the polite thing to do.

What do you call a dead child? The product of a car crash

Did you hear the joke about the deaf guy ? He didn't.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

Roses are black Violets are too I am a dog I don't know how to rhyme

What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

What's the hardest thing about eating a quadriplegic? The wheelchair.

what kind of dog has no tail? a hot dog

why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

Why didn't Suzie Fall off the Swings? She Has no legs and couldn't get on

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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