Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

you know what they say... hydrate or die

thumb_up thumb_down +29

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

thumb_up thumb_down -91

I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

thumb_up thumb_down -99

what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

thumb_up thumb_down +110

Your mom is so...wonderful.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops