Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

make me a sandwich!

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

Knock, Knock The door's open

What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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