You tie a noose around your neck, you jump off a cliff and before you hit the ground you shoot yourself in the head.

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? It didn't. Anyone who would believe that is a complete moron.

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my candy brings all the kids to the yard and i'm like- get in the van.

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http://api.solvemedia.com/papi/media?c=2@4kVxPaRsBr6xmKYFf1AWrnUekZ5Qm16e@VS0Tc9Os5q8ENU8bgrSzdX9APTC4lJjowvMEvv53MnevBtoOvXkqvmo6q3GRjryi4pBIcsYECoiZmERhCMm3t7otsPlwyu31uNcluNyw3UKXeBeML2ZQF3X3Wfs3WC6Cdp-lOv-Y0fRdSiML4k2yPqmVJrbT.a9hCr0BoWsRJvq7n7aejLjOmz3h3eZDdwJaN54pFV-QOvO5sQ5wVZlVq-2yi9hMbBbb213AoVTT7vLIhTq0xcBFvtuMdWdS2jn2ActORr3W16MmSEVcgrS6gA;w=300;h=150;fg=ffffff;bg=5d216b

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A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

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Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

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Q: What has the exact same colors as the gay flag but are sometimes hilarious? A: Clowns.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? Dead babies are not sports cars

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a blonde and a brunet are in an elevator. a man walks in the brunet says to the blonde "he has dandruff, he needs head and shoulders.' then the blonde says "we can give him head, but how can we give him shoulders."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It would be unlikely for any entity of this time to speak English and communicate with chickens so it is improbable for one to know the answer.

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Ethan's girlfriend is a salg hahahahahahahahahahahaha fucking meff she needs to die

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Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

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How is a hamster like a cigarette? They are harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire

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What do you call a blonde surgeon? Not stereotypical

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How can you tell two twin sisters apart? Look at one twin, then look at the other, and acknowledge that they are two different people.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

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What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

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What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

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A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

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Why did the other Albino cross the road? He was running away from a witch doctor who was going to brutally murder him and steal his body parts.

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Why did the Jewish girl fall off the swing? Because Amon Goeth shot her in the head from his balcony with his rifle. --Amon Goeth's friend

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How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

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Why is the duck? Because it has two feet the same.

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A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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