Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

what did the Alaskan homeless man get for Christmas? Death

What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

WHO LET THE GHOST OUT! BOO BOO BOO BOO BOO! Mortals: That was a bit funny...

Knock Knock Who's there? Ada! Ada who? Ada burger for lunch!

What’s worse than being ruled by Adolf Hitler? Being ruled by Joseph Stalin.

An Icelandic boy hangs himself because of peer pressure. His family mourns for their loss

what do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting at your doorstep? matt what do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the water? bob what do you call a man that just had his daughter taken away from him? ...sam

what happend when the little boy went on the rollercoaster ? It crashed.

Q) What do you call a black president? A) Mr. President

what did the downsindrome get for christmas?? A: Aids and a Dead wife

Q: What is green, has red shoes, exists in videogames and runs really really fast while collecting rings, running trough loops, has a fox sidekick etc? A: Sonic The Hedgefrog. Moral: I was always a bigger fan of Super Fratelli Brothers though...

What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

What's worse then finding 10 babies in 1 trashcan? Finding 1 baby in 10 trashcans.

Your momma's so fat she has diabetes and my have to get one of her legs amputated. It's actually quite sad.

knock knock whose there? i don't know...

My uncle Magnus and my Aunty Agnus had a baby and named it.............Death.

Why did the chicken cross the road Cause he wanted to

Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far.

Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

Susie fell of a swing and died Knock Knock Who's there Susie

I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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