a blond girl walks into a bar

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

a black man walked into a black bar. what color was the bar afterwards? the same color. its a drinking spot not a pole

What did the Norwegian say to the Englisman? ØLølølølÅæåøåæøåæåæåæåæåæåæåæå

Q: What's the difference between a grasshopper and pencil? A: Lots

why did kyle and jake have sex? Because they were gay.

What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

What did the DVD player say when a video tape was put in? You incompatible.

You know whats funnier than 24? What? 25.

A black man goes to his dentist appointment and the doctor asks, have you brushed your teeth today laderius? the black man replies: Yes, but my name is not laderius

why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well neither has he.

Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

What does a man and an orange have in common? Nothing.

Knock knock? Who's there? Cancer Cancer who? After some time and various bouts of radiation and chemotherapy, he finally lost his life to the terrible disease.

What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

What did the doctor say to his patient? You were supposed to die 12 seconds ago....

Why did the little boy fall asleep? His parent pulled the plug.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

"knock knock?" ITS 2012 WE HAVE DOOR BELLS!!!

Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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