Knock Knock. Who's There? A Banana. The middle aged man opened the door, prepared to distribute candy to the trick or treaters.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? a stick

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.. Q: Why didn't she have any arms? A: 50. Cal... Q: Wait where'd she go? A: I don't know there's a helicopter in my scop- wait what the f**k is going on?.... TO: CoD 4 Players -Ap

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Girl look at that body, girl look at that body, I got passion in my pants... Actually I lied, I got a penis and testicles in my pants, but I'm afraid to show it because people might think it's small, sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms in it, what's worse than that? The holocaust, whats worse than that? Biting into an apple and finding 3 worms in it

thumb_up thumb_down +3

7+5=12

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks into a bar. And has a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

WE BE-ETH YON KNIGHTS OF THE ROUND TABLE

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the girl say to the mute? "Why are you so quiet?" How did the mute respond? He flipped her off.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's big, moves around everywhere, and has four wheels? four TEENS on four wheelers

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A young black guy was explaining how he was raised by a single mother

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Hhahahahahhahhahahahahhaahhayournanisdeadhahhahahahahahahah

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Accept for cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats better than sitting here writing anti jokes? Sitting in ENGLISH and writing anti jokes. Shoutout to Link Deas

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops