you know what rhymes with sloth. rape

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

Knock Knock. Who's There? The Landlord. Your rent's late.

6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9

A Christian asks God why there is so much pain and suffering in the world. Everyone around him moves away from the grown man talking to his imaginary friend.

yo mamas so fat that when she wears a bathing suit people go "wow, that women is fat"

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

When Kurt Cobain was little, his mother told him to never play with guns but I guess it went through one ear and out the other.

What do you call a Black man with AIDS? Unfortunate.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't. It's dead.

Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

Why did the man cross the street? Because no cars were coming and he wanted to get to the othher side

how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

Why was the African Americanfemale at an abortion clinic? Because she just killed a child.

Jackie Chan: Who the **** is chuck Testa? A: Chuck Testa was an internet sensation who became famous after his video on Youtube advertising his taxidermy business, Ojai Valley Taxidermy.

When life gives you cancer, make cancerade.

Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

Knock knock. Who's there? Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl who? Quetzalcóatl, Mayan name Kukulcán, (from Nahuatl quetzalli, “tail feather of the quetzal bird [Pharomachrus mocinno],” and coatl, “snake”), the Feathered Serpent, one of the major deities of the ancient Mexican pantheon. Oh... hi.

I once had a friendly cohort, whose limericks often ran short, but this one doesn't, I don't know why, Also, he often can't rhyme.

Guess what my dog can do? Bark.

Do you wanna build a snowman ? No.

I regret everything.....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...