Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would run away too if your name was urdaagaa.

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What computer sings the best? A Dell? No a Mac, because they are the superior computer.

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Prince of bell air with Keanu Reeves: SMIIIIIIIIIIITH! DID YOU DESTROY MY COUCH? Neo: ... WELL DID YOU BOTHER CARLTON DOING HIS STUFF? Neo... Will you shut up then? ... Intro: This, is my story, read the text, thank you.

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Latvian guy said to the other latvian guy: ''Why did the chicken cross the road?'' The other latvian guy responded: ''In truth, i do not know. I have not seen chicken in 10 years. The last time was before the red army plundered my village. I can still hear all the screams from the women being raped. But, back to question. Where is this chicken you speak of? I have not eaten in days and my wife and children are close to starvation aswell''

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Man 1: HEY DUDE! Man 2: Go shoot yourself

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock - who's there? Bob -bob who.... Bobs knocking for suzie!

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead..

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A priest, R Kelly, and Michael Jackson walk into a bar. They proceed to molest small children.

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What do you call an elephant on the moon? Dead.

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You know what is funnier than 24???? I don't know that's why I was asking

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Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

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What did the priest do to the little crying boy in an enclosed room? He forgave the boy for his sins. Then he raped him.

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What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

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Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

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pudding

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what did the blind orphan with no legs get for christmas? cancer.

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What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

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how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

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You know what's catchy? A cold

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Q: What's long, hard, and full of sea men? A: A submarine.

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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what did the tree say when it fell down? Nothing it is humanly impossible for a tree to talk. Especially after it fell down. I mean that would hurt.

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What do you do when a dog chews your pen? Use a pencile instead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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