How do you stop a vehicle moving at high speeds? Apply the brakes in a reasonable fashion.

thumb_up thumb_down

Doctor, I am afraid of doctors, I dont even dare seek them up. Janitor: Thats quite apparent... Dr.Moral:

thumb_up thumb_down

I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

thumb_up thumb_down

There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down

hey do you eat out a woman properly? you cook her first and then eat her. -jeffery dahmers

thumb_up thumb_down

A guy who plays shooting games acquires an assault rifle but he doesn't kill anyone, why? Because he was a nice and peaceful man who loves his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down

two men are sitting in a desk next to each other learning math when the equation 22+1 came up. the frist man says to the second, "24" and they both giggled. the second guy then slips his lips over the the first guy and whispers, "hey, i just thought of something funnier than 24" to which the first replies with a slight of laughter, "lemme hear it." so the second says with laughter "25".

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. Why is me question not funny? A. Because there is no point to it.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the little boy die? He had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why does Jimmy Neutron have a big head? Heredity.

thumb_up thumb_down

ding dong thats right no knock on door anymore

thumb_up thumb_down

I'm hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What was the last thing that went through the WTC jumper's head? His ankles.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a black baby? A nigglet

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Who's Italian and plays with a peach? Mario

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a person who will soon die of beeties

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So two guys walk into a bar and the third one ducks

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to use a female name.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats scary about the asian man driving a car? He was blind

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops