Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a jewish man with a boner walks into a wall what does he hit first his cheek due to the fact he was looking at an attractive woman

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why do i have a pain in my left side i dont know but im scared

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How was a blonde woman able to get into Harvard? She was smart and had a very good SAT score.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Bad grammers.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar and at the bar he sees this guy with a blue head. He asks the man with the blue head if he can buy him a drink. The man with the blue head says "sure... you want to know about the blue head don't you?" "Yes i do" "Okay it all starts with a genie, he gave me 3 wishes, the first wish was to have a beautiful wife and a house to put her in, the second wish was for a ton of money, and the third wish was for a blue head."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

knock knock... whose there? I don't know why don't you open it and find out dumb ass... Gosh people and their common sense these days!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the Mexican guy get for christmas? Deported

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Your mother is so fat she has trouble finding clothes in her size.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

kesha is a virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between a truck full of dead babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't pick up the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get 2x1=4? Do the wrong math.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Some people like melon and others like soup.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats red and dirty? Her period

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man took a police officers gun and threw it at a baby in a stroller. He went to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how many toyota's does it take to pee on a soccer game 900 because isis is a cat vagina

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick basterd !

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what's worse than getting raped the guy who raped you has aids

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops