How do you catch wet wood on fire? Ask a business owner in Ferguson, MO, to keep it in their store.

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how do you find a ghost? shoot yourself.

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Roses are Roses Violets are Violets I am to Literal, That is a statement.

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Why did the lights turn off? Because I turned them off.

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Ronan Parke, making Justin Bieber look straight since 2009

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why do people copy other people's anti-jokes? because they don't have a life nor an imagination. P.S. if this gets a lot of thumbs ups, expect another one soon from one of those people who copy others anti-jokes...

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Why does a black person buy water? Because everyone needs water to survive SKH RZH

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A Man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The Bartender proceeds to unload a 30 round banana clip into his head, neck, and midsection.

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I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

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Why can you punish cows but not fish? Because you can ground beef, but not fish!

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What did the Wind say to the Window? (Insert Racist punchline here)

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How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family cried about his final days of his life.

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Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

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Guy: "Did you hear about the guy who cried wolf?" Friend: "Yes. He was pulling your leg. People cry tears not wolves." Guy: "How did you know he was pulling my leg?" Friend: "If you look down, he's still there pulling it."

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? It had no legs.

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oh hai

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Why did the black man buy watermellon? Because he was having a barbecue in his suburban neighborhood and he wanted some fruit.

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What did the guy who dropped his iPhone do? He went out and bought a knew one.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? (No answer)

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Why did the black guy get kicked out of school? Because he was poor academically.

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Tough crowd tonight...

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What's the difference between a black man and a park seat? A park seat can support a family

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What do you call the CEO of a successful company? Rich.

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look at the top of your screen. now look down. I MADE YOU DO THAT

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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