whats 2+2 equal? 4

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knock knock who's there who who who who who what are you a retarded owl

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What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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Q: How did the black man cross the Atlantic? A: He flew with an airliner, a large fixed-wing aircraft for transporting passengers and cargo.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

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Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

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What happens when you cross a starfish with a dog? Dogs and chickens are from a different phylum, they are genetically incompatible.

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And Stephen Hawking said.

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Wanna know what makes me smilee? Facial Muscles

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What do cats eat for breakfast? Cat food.

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A man climbs up a tree. Once he reaches the top he is scared and thus incapable of getting down.

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Leslie's husband admitted to being gay, which came to the surprise of no one, seeing as Leslie is a man.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a porsche? i don't have i dead baby in my garage. That would be wrong

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Which came first the chicken or the egg? The egg because if a chicken came first then that means chickens magically appeared. Eggs however may change over time through evolution by a common ancestor because after millions of years of hatching, it slowly mutated by natural selection and became to what is now known as the domestic chicken. (Applause)

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A pregnant woman walked into a bar what did she say? Can i have a drink

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If I give you 5 dollars, and you give me 5 dollars, then we both still have 5 dollars, which when combined will equal 10 dollars. Meaning we could buy something that cost's 10 dollars or less. But we should probably also factor in tax, so we should only buys something that costs a little over 9 dollars.

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What happens every 5 seconds? An African kid dies.

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Roses are Red Violets are Black Why is your chest As flat as your back

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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whats worse than being cold? having a pine cone shoved up your ass.

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Why was the blonde in the bathroom for 2 hours. She had to pee really bad.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you thro them

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops