A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says what do you want? the duck says nothing cause ducks can't talk

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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bish bash bosh giz a nosh

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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You and your parents are going to die today

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why did the girl break up with her boyfriend? hes gay

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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rosie o'donald goes on a diet

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What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

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What ended my last relationship? Oncoming traffic.

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If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

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Q: What's the biggest lie ever? A: Saying you read the Terms of Service

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. The man was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral service.

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Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

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A black man in a country bar.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

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Wats rong with yo leg.....

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

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3 men walk into a bar. they all take a cab home to keep from having an accident due to their intoxication.

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A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

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Farmers are outstanding in their fields

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Three blonds walk into a bar ... They said ouch!

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knock knock who's there? a dog ......dogs cant talk ..................

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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