A man buys a prius

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a serial rapist.

Yo mama's so fat, that she's fat.

What's Terry short for? He's missing a leg.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

What's worse than breaking your leg and not being able to walk? Breaking your neck because you will most likely not be able to walk from the high probability of being paralyzed for the rest of your life.

Q: How Do You Stop a Bus? A: Pull the Brakes so it comes to a absolute stop.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

Why did the giant frog attack the party goers with a ballistic missile? oh where tos tart...it's, just such a long story, I don't really know where to begin, in fact it's probably better if you just take my word for it, no need to go into details. we just don't have time for that now.

mom.what is red and green? dad. what? mom. your mama dad. you Mack me cry mom gooooooooooooooooood girl. mom have you seen gmom mom.no dad. your mom killed her girl. rely mom. yes girl.thanks she suck dick for money and now i have to get a new bed so thanks mom.ya dad. so you want to be dead mom and girl. or u want to be dead dad. help me plz nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo mom.yes girl yes

Want to hear a dirty joke? Mud.

Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

Q. What do you call cheese that's not yours? A. Stolen, you're under arrest.

What has four wheels, two wings, and flies? A bird...I was kidding about the wheels.

A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

whos the bitch now!?! you are.

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Why is Timmy a dumbass ? He's not, because asses cannot, by definition, be intelligent, so it is unnecessary to qualify it as "dumb".

A horse walks into a bar, realizes that he shouldnt be here so he walks out.

Q. Why did the kid drop his tennis racket? A. Because he got run over by a tank!

How do you wake up lady gaga? Shoot her in the head repeatedly

If Jimmy has $5, and he finds $20 on the street, how much money does Jim have? None. He was mugged by a black man.

Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasnt wearing a seat belt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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