Q.If your have $6.00 and I have a hair cut, how many donkeys are in the paddock? A. Aliens with a hat????????????

Whats worse than burning jews? jews that are alive

TOBUSCUS

A biology teacher walks into a bar. "Ouch," he says. "I bet I just lost some brain cells. I wonder if any of them were going through mitosis..."

Best joke: Okay so I got a joke for ya but it is pretty long so bare with me please. First off, you must have heard a knock knock joke before and you must have a huge sense of humor. So this guy walks into a bar and orders fried chicken wings with hot fudge and vinilla drizzled all over it with a cherry topping. The bartender says, "We don't have that." The guy thinks of anything else he'd like and says, "How about a bucket of turkey and jalapeños?" The bartender looks puzzled and once again says, "This is a bar..." The guy is now paranoid and says, "Fine, I'll just have a thick, juicy, chicken thigh but please remove any excess skin on it, it's unhealthy and I'm on a diet." The bartender slowly removes his apron and walks out of the bar shouting, "I QUIT!" The guy sits there on the barstool laughing as a lady bartender comes to him. "So sorry sir, what would you like? From our bar that we have available?" The guy stares at her, squinting. "By any chance do you know if you have the punch line to this 'joke' because I sure dont." Slowly the woman removes her apron and walks out of the bar. The guy grins, walks out, and says, "job well done today. Where to tomorrow?"

Q: Where can you find a cat with no arms and no legs? A: Right where you left him Q: Where can you find a dog with no arms and no legs? A: In a bun

How do you make a homeless person cry? cut an onion in front of him.

Q. How are a bird and a turtle alike? A. They both fly. Except the turtle.

What do you call a black man who has become a millionare? A financhaly successful buisnessman who worked hard to be where he is today.

A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

to boys are playing football 1 ses pass tje over ses pass wot

Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

Why did you not just "put a spell" on her instead? And you are totally mean, ever actually killed someone?

Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

roses are red violets are blue porn hub is down your mums facebook will do

Why did the old lady have a heart attack? She got raped by a giraffe.

How do you make a little boy get off a swing? You are an adult and perhaps it is inappropriate for you to be on a swing, especially when it is already occupied by a child of the right age.

What was Hellen Keller's Dog's name? Kamikaze Go, it was the first Akita Dog in the United States.

your moms soooooo FAT that she went on a diet and became really sexy

What do you call a blonde with big breasts? A woman. Some call her "mom".

Did you hear about the alter boy that wasn't molested by a priest?

Dylan is gay

Q: Why is Santa's sack so big? A: Because he only cums once a year

Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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