What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing.

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you and your family will die tonight

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How do u know a black woman is pregnant? When she pulls out a tampon it has no cotton on it.

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roses are red violets suck dick i need a wee

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What's red, green, and goes about 200 mph A fire hidrent I lied about the green and the 200 mph

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Bob dole

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A. Do you know what they call Bing Crosby in Sweden? B. No. A. Bing Crosby.

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What did the little boy become for Halloween? An orphan, his parents were killed that day.

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why did the boy have to go to the dentist he was hit by a brick

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Debating on internet is like competing in the paralympics, even if you win you're still retarded

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? You've already seen this joke at least SIXTY TIMES on this website, so you already know.

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A women walks into a kitchen.

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If she's old enough to count, she's probably in second grade.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. | | + | + + + + Why did the chicken get run over the farmers tractor? Because the chicken crossed the road and didn't look both ways before crossing and didn't see the tractor that ran him over. P.S. The chicken died and the farmer was arrested for animal abuse.

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What did the teacher say to the pupil who was bad at maths? You are bad at maths and will never complete any sum EVER!

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What kind of nun would never drink milk? One who suffers from a severe lactose intolerance.

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how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

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I was born.

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Why did the girl fall down the hill? Her boyfriend pushed her.

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What's pink and shaped like a V? A pink V.

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how do you start a stamped in mexico roll a nickle down the street sad thing is you just lost a nickle

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I like the way he thinks. Too bad he has alzheimers.

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Why couldn't the women cook for her family She had no arms, therefore incapable of preforming the task.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops