Did you hear about the absent minded professor that tried to change the tire on his pickup truck? He forgot to lock the jack and the truck crushed his head like and egg shell.

Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

What do you call a man with a shovel through his head? Unless he was carrying ID when he died; John Doe.

My grandmother always said "slow and steady wins the race."...... She died in a fire

If dropped from the same height, which hits the ground first an apple or a baby? the apple because the baby has a rope tied around its neck

why was the boy lonely? his whole family died in a plane crash

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? -getting raped by 10 very hung men who go balls deep

What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

Who has big eyes, big ears, and a big mouth? The witness I'm about to murder so he cannot testify against me. Wish me luck.

what do you call a football team without players a group of coaches

Can I ask you a question? You just did

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

whats the best thing ever to happen to chuk norris ? he was born !!!!

There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

I am nobody Nobody is perfect Therefore, I am perfect

why did u fart to loud? because you butt said so

A drunk guy walks into a bar. A blind man walks into the same bar.

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Knock Knock Whos there Who Yan Who Yan Who Chow Yan Chow

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

Why did Susan fall out a tree? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Susan

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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