Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

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What have a blueberry and a raspberry got in common? They both can't ride a skateboard

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Did you hear about the deaf kid? He didn't.

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Why will this joke be the most hated? Because it sucks

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

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What do you call a fat person with no friends? An individual who is over the expected weight of a person their age, who finds themselves disliked by people in their s surroundings, possibly due to their weight problem, but also it may be because of any personality defects they may have, or they simply may prefer to be alone.

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Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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I'm so hungry I could eat a well prepared meal!

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A minor, her mom, her aunt and a marine went out drinking...they had a fun night

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Why did the rabbit jump? Because that's what rabbits do.

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why did the cow eat a computer? Why? Who knows

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your going to die

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Hey, I'm Schrödinger, and this is crazy! But here's a sealed box... the cat lives, maybe...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had herpes.

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What is the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because the walk sign said to

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What do you call a blonde who tries to swim on land? - Stupid.

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Why was the kid happy? Because it was his birthday.

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops