Knock. Knock. Who's there? lettuce lettuce who? Lett-uce be friends

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Q: What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? A: A dog

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SUBway eat fresh ZOMbies eat fleash

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i lost the game

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How does a pirate get to work? His CAAAARRRR! Where does the pirate go after work? The BAAAARRRR! How does the pirate get home from the bar? A taxi. A pirate doesn't drive after consuming alcohol.

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How do you know if a black man was in your house while you weren't home? When you let them enter to babysit your children.

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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a pig ate a hobo, the hobo was a blind rapist from canada

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Meow.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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charlie sheen losing

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The cat climbed a tree. It didn't want to come down, so it starved to death.

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GONNA

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how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

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What's the same about a crouton and a pencil case? Both are used for dirty things, such as shoe tying.

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What is worse than going to school without your homework? Going to school naked without your homework.

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i was driving home after work but i had to stop because an old lady wanted to cross the road..... the old lady was abused by her father as a child, and had Alzheimer's

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff card at the bottom of a pool.

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69

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Why was the squirrel late for work? Because the traffic was nuts!

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What's black can run really fast and jump really high? A panther

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one day i went to bed

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What do you call a dead, black child? Dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple, nothing rhymes with purple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops