A man walked into a bar Ouch.

What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

Knock Knock *opens the door*

text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

Why did the boys uncle stop calling him? His uncle died of cancer 3 months ago.

What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

How do you keep a puppy warm? You throw it in the fire...

Person A - I farted Person B - YUCK

Never tell Alzheimer's jokes to old people. They will not remember them.

What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

Q. what did the gay man say about the smoothie? A. he said "that is soooo good"

Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

Sex is not the answer. Sex is a question. Yes is the answer.

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

Justin Bieber is a good singer.

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

Have you ever heard of Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

whats worse than stubbing your toe? getting a vanarial disease and going insane

You're flying over a lake in your canoe and the wheels fall off. How many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? None! because ice-Cream doesn't have legs!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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