Q: How do you kill an Asian? A: Deprive of calculator or shoot it.

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What do you call Justin Bieber having sex with a woman? Two people of the opposite gender having sex.

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The Game.

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Why did Michael Jackson became a white person? Because the society hates black people

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house. A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

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What did the cowboy say to the skunk? You smell.

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A lion walks into a barber shop and asks for a haircut and the barber says no then the lion proceeds to kill everyone in the shop

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So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

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theres a giant burning orb in the sky and it can burn your flesh, it can give you diseases, it can kill you, looking directly at it causes physical pain, and we all think this is okay. we like this orb. we like to go outside and lie around on our backs when this orb is in the sky. children draw cute pictures of this levitating death orb with a smiley face on it. what is wrong with us

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What did the kid with no arms get for christmas? No one knows he hasn't been able to open his presents yet.

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Womens' Rights

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What do you do when a black person steals your computer Inform the authorities, as theft is a felony.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What do you call it when a black man and a japanese woman get married? A wedding.

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Knock knock Who's there? Batman Batman who? Because he was

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where do you find sunglasses at? the store

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Why do all the Republicans hate Obama? He's a Democrat.

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What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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