Cashier: Have a nice day sir! Grumpy man: Don't tell me what kind of day to have ya fruit!

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What's the biggest difference between white and black people? the melanin levels in their skin.

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Why did the man stand on one foot? Because he had one leg.

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What's invisble and smells like bananas? My mailbox.

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if x marks the spot, what does y do? y does the laundry.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

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ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

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Yes.

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Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

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Why did the boy fall of his bike? His mother threw a fridge at him

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dog

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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knock, knock! who`s there? it`s me ! who me? yes!

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What's worse than banning guns? Very few things

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Who is a knob? ross d

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Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

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why did tom drop his ice cream he didn't because he had no icecream

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No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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