Q.) How do you fit a baby into a bowl? A.) With a blender! Q.) How do you get it out? A.) With Tostitos! -Sebastian and Chris (aka 100 and Zelot) (we did not make this joke, we just had to share it)

thumb_up thumb_down +15

anti jokes aren't always funny on here

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What does ms colot like to eat? Pants

thumb_up thumb_down +15

dead battery come on down

thumb_up thumb_down +15

today i wanted to write a joke...... a joke

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why do some Jewish people have big noses? There religion doesn't affect the size of there nose it really depends on genetics, like the if there parents had a big nose, or a small one would probably affect the size of a Jewish person nose

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a bar and says "Ow".

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you say the big head boy? Brush yo teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock Knock! I have a door bell, you idiot!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black man walks up to a bank teller and pulls out a gun, he proceeds to tell the bank teller he saw a white man drop it outside the bank.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what is pink and fishy? pink fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Helen Keller do when she found a dead body? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what do you call a black man on tv? an actor

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is dangerous when eaten? My grandmother's cooking?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the Hobo get for Christmas? Nothing,He celebrated Hanukkah.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops