Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

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Q:How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could would A: 26

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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What do you call two dead blondes? A terrible day for their families and for many more to come

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When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, he can't come anyway.

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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A Jewish man died in a car crash. His family mourned his death throughout the next few years.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex.

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What did the monkey say to the owner of the world's rarest stamp? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

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Why did the teacher yell at her students? The class was acting completely inappropriate and she felt it was necessary to discipline them so the current situation won’t repeat its self.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

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John has 38 candy bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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24

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Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

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What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

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Knock knock who's there? Screw this Screw this who? Im screwing this like ur boyfriend screwed you!

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So a female ant walks into a bar... and someone steps on it.

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Stewie: MOM! MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! Lois: WHAT!!! Stewie: Hi, hehehehehehe. Family Guy -Louis

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and chess? Michael Jackson's dead.

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Why did the boy laugh? Mr Tickle was his babysitter

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What do u get when u mix a dinosaur and a lesbian? A-lick-alot-a-puss

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whats the difference between colby and a high schooler? Colby hasn't matured yet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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