A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

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what do you call 6 black guys hung in a tree? a arazona wind chime

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Why did the pig walk into the bar Because he was thirsty

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Anti-joke.com

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Q: how do u piss off a plumber? A: kill his whole family

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Why didn't Jim go to the party? He wasn''t invited.

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What happened? I have absolutely no idea.

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What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

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what did the crippled boy get for christmas? cancer.

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a horse walks into a blender ow

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omg this doesn't work 1.hold breath for 5 minutes 2.die it doesn't work cause you would just knock yourself unconconsiuse and your body will start breathing for you again until you wake up

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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What does an owl and a mole have in common? They both live underground, apart from the owl

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How many pieces of bling does it take to ruin a rap song? Just Two Chainz

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? D-12.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a shark? One is a person and one is a fish. Other than that, not much at all.

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Darude - Sandstorm

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Knock Knock Who's There? The Police The Police Who? Uhm, Ma'am your son just died in a car wreck

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What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

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Dancing Potatoe!

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this is the part where we na na na na every good song needs a na na na na wake up at night screaming na na na na my grandmothers nickname is nana

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A treadmill... did I mention he was kinda fat?

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Did you hear the one about the kid that farted in class? Cool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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