Your mom is so fat that she is fat.

- Knock knock - I have a doorbell

What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

What did the blind man say to the librarian? Hello, I am looking for books that are published in braille.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's ... Roses are Red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's (continues)

Q

3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

What do you call a black hitch-hiker? Stranded

Person 1 What's good? Person 2 Your mom's love making

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt will thank you.

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

Roses are red Violets r blue My name is Dave Microwave

How much carlins does it take to screw in a light bulb? One

BOOBIES!!!!!!!

How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? All over. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally

person 1: Did you hear about the black man that went to college? Person 2: no i haven't Person 1: either have I What's ironic is that they are both black

Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

Why did Michael Jackson go to McDonald's? Because he was hungry.

Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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