Have you ever met a black man who wasn't good at basketball? I have, quite regularly.

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Why did Dave not hug his wife? Because she looked horrifying from the Iraq war.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly doesn't contain pieces of fruit.

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Q. Why did the rooster switch on the TV? A. Just for some hentertainment!

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What has 4 eyes but can't see? A blind man wearing glasses.

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What do you call a Muslim taking control of an airplane? A pilot. -Tag

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

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22

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I ate a pancake for breakfast not

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i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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HOLY SHIT BITCH!!!

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Why did Bill yell? Because he stepped on a nail.

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What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

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Why didn't the black man brush his teeth today? Because he was already too late for work.

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

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Why do they call it a clock radio?... because it's both.

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Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

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whats worse than a paper cut? 2012

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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