Need homeless tips? Get A Job.

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Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

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What did Billy get his parents for Christmas? Billy's an orphan.

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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Q. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT GEORGE BUSH? A. NOTHING

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your momma is so stupid she failed math class

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

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Knock knock Who's there? What.

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what's the difference between a lamborghini and you're mother. cars don't scream when you rape them

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

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How do Jewish people celebrate Christmas? Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas, for Christmas is an annual commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ, celebrated generally on December as a religious and cultural holiday by billions of people around the world. A feast central to the Christian liturgical year, it closes the Advent season and initiates the twelve days of Christmastide. Christmas is a civil holiday in many of the world's nations, is celebrated by an increasing number of people, and is an integral part of the Christmas and holiday season.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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no u

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Robin, get in the car.

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What did the man say to his wife? Go make me a sandwich!

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: I am.

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Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

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What did the mute child say to his parents for the first time? "My head hurts" Doctors later found he had hypertensitive heart disease and an aneurysm in his brain. He died later that month.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Just kidding, Stephen Hawking doesn't drink.

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Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

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A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

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How did Hitler like his steaks? He didn't like steaks, he was a vegetarian.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops