Why did the monkey fall out of the tree Because it died

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

roses are red violets are blue corey mills is and got raped by you

What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

What's a good joke? Not this one.

What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

We could have had it all Rolling in the deep You have my heart inside of your hand As you've just now inexplicably ripped it out of my ribcage.

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because it broke...

Stephen Hawking

What happens when there is a jew next to you and you are standing on a train track? A train hits you both and you both die.

Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...