How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

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my wifes star sign is cancer, kinda ironic how she died really..... she got eaten by a giant crab.

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? Pretty much anything.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Knock knock, COME IN!

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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whats green and slimy? green slim

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

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What happened to the man who jumped off a building? He got hit by a bus on the way down.

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

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Whats worse them finding a worm in your apple??? finding out your adopted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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