- Anti Joke

What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

How do you make a blonde go 'ewwwww'? Hand her a moose placenta.

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Well many scientists have theorized that a giant meteor hit the earth causing the extinction of most living things. Also if your christian : Dinosaurs never existed, evolution is the devils work, science is not the answer to the world's problems. Darwin was a foolish man, and thats that.

People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

A muslim man with a long beard and wearing a turban and robe boards an aircraft with a large suitcase. The plane later arrives at its destination a few minutes past the estimated arrival time due to bad weather.

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

Little Jimmy's mommy loved to see the smile on her only son's face as he ate her homemade cookies. Due to lack of medical knowledge at the time, Little Jimmy contracted diabetes and died before he turned 30. Unmarried and childless, he was diligently working on his doctorate thesis on Astrophysics. His death marked the end of his family line.

How do you get someone off a swing? ask them politely.

whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

chuck noris- can swim through land god- can walk on watter i- can run on air

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

What do Black people call their fathers? Dad.

Why is three afraid of four? Because four ate five.

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I like poop in my butt

Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

Who will win in a fight Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris? I don't even know who he is -Lets go METS!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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