How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

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Three nuns were talking in the church. The first nun said, "I was looking in the Priest's desk and found a condom." The second nun said, "I saw also saw that condom, except I poked holes in it." The third nun promptly reported them to the Priest causing the first two nuns to lose thier jobs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

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Once upon a time there was beautiful princess, ONCE!

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what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

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Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

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Your mom.

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Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

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Why could the woman cook for her family? She didn't have one she was anti-social

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

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Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

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What did the wannabe mother get for Christmas A miscarriage.

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The.

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What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? Nigger

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Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

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whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

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What do superheroes say after they save someone? Whatever the hell they want.

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I know what makes young boys "explode" -dynamite

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Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

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What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

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My hair is thin, therefore the person beside me wears oddly looking clothes CC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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