What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

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Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender says ouch.

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Yo Mama just died.

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Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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why did the asian wearing a sombrero buy orange juice at 2am? because hes trying to stay sober and do away with alcohol for good because its ruining his family and he wants to be a good father and husband.

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The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

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The WNBA

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a baby? Humans don't eat babies, other than a Cannibals because some tend to eat babies.

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what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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mitchell palmer sucks

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What's great about taking a shower with a twelve year old girl. Pulling her hair back and making her look like a six year old

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I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

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whats the difference between a guitar and a fish? A guitar is an instrument used to produce noise and a fish is a living orgnism native to lakes and oceans

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead." Ha! It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says that there are no dogs allowed, but the man says that he is blind. So the man sits down with his dog and asks for a drink. The bartender decided to check to see if he was really blind, so he says, " Hey, do you know what time it is?" The blind man replies, "7 o'clock," The bartender says, "Ha! You said you were blind! Get out of..." but was interrupted by the man, who promptly said, "No, I'm deaf," and left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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