Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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a black man walked into a black bar. what color was the bar afterwards? the same color. its a drinking spot not a pole

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how many couples does it take to screw in a light bulb. 1 the wife to go buy the light bulb and the husbend to put it in.

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The Chicken was crossing the road one afternoon, he was fined by a police officer for J walking He made it to the other side.

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

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Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

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A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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Why is Evan short? He was born that way.

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Whats the differents between a red farrari and a dead baby? I dont have a red farrari in my garage;)

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

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Why can't the Asian do math? He has down-syndrome.

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Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

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How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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So there's this big ass bronco right? It goes to a store and it asks Ben Roethlisberger "Do you know where I can find some girls to rape?" Ben Roethlsiberger says "In aisle 5" so the moose goes down to aisle 5 but there aint no girls!

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How do you stop a baby crying? You don't. Just walk away.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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Hey, wanna here a dirty joke? A pig fell in mud.

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A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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