What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

Why is there no gambling in Africa? Because there's no money in Africa.

What did little Timmy find at the bottom of the well? The fact that he could no longer breathe and thus causing him to drown.

why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

Your mum's so fat that she's incredibly lucky she has a loving and supportive husband who values her personality over her appearance.

Knock knock come in.

Why did the man cry... He got hit with a fridge

A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

I like touching my boobs

What's purple, red, green and does jumping jacks. Nothing... that sounds pretty crazy if you ask me.

Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

When you have read this, you've already read it.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "I was born with an extra chromosome."

whats worse than taking a refrigerator to the face? the holocaust and AIDs

911 jokes are just plane wrong

A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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