What did the scarf say to the hat? Nothing, a scarf can't talk.

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Bill Walters from across the street. How are we talking through a door?

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How does Justin Bieber remove a condom? he farts

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What did the Woman say to the man after he walked into the pole? That was a pole you idiot

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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jess always squints her eyes when making a point

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knowone loved me why???????????????????????? because they were so damm ugly

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What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

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Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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Whats Funnier than the Holacaust? A: Nothing you asshole!

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

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One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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there are 2 men standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is called Peter

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Why did the bus drive off the cliff? It's driver happened to be a tomato.

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What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

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Your family is so fat that when their feet hit the ground, it recorded 9 on the richter scale, because they were launched at the Earth at close to the speed of light, and when you account for relativistic mass effects, the amount of energy that was displaced into the ground was tremendous

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Jesse is so fat, his weight on his scale says " hahaha gotta love childhood obesity"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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