Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have AIDS, Now you do too!

thumb_up thumb_down

Q.Who do you call a lesbian. A.Shhaammmmm

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did William go home. His mother called and they were having a potroast

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's the opposite of a joke. An anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

thumb_up thumb_down -82

knock knock whose there?? seth oh, come in

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Why couldn't johnny go home? Someone commited arsen and burned it down.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

so the guy @ the asian restaurant ask the waiter why his beverage tastes funny and the asian waiter says "It's likely that you are used to classic coke and they changed the formula"

thumb_up thumb_down +39

theres a fat guy

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the difference between Jews, Muslims & Christians? Religious beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender jokingly asks him, "Why the long face?!" The horse replies, "I was just diagnosed with cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A Homosexual, a Jew and a Black walk into a bar. They do not speak make eye contact or acknowledge each other in any way.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A duck walks up to the lemonade stand. The man running the stand then smiles with a tear in his eye as he is reminded of when he and his now dead parents used to feed the ducks at a nearby lake every Sunday afternoon.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did Shakespeare say to the software designer? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops