one day ill be as old as you but you'll be older then too.

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Why didn't the black guy get paid for doing work hard at labor? it was the year of 1860!!

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Why did the kid die last night? because his mum stabbed him multiple times in the chest.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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In Soviet Russia, this joke is an anti-joke.

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A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

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Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

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this last joke was a correction to the other one

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Q: What did the racoon say to the cow? A: Nothing, because neither have the extansive intillect to speak in a manner that the other would understand.

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A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says nothing, because he's a horse The bartender soon relizes there is a horse in his bar, and calls animal control

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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What happen when Sarah made but her nose in other people's business? Her vagina got set on fire by cole and derrek shoved your head up his ass!

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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What did the rabbit buy the Jewish duck for Hanukkah? Nothing, animals don't celebrate holidays.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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What's bigger than a breadbox? Whitney Houston's coffin.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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