A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: Yes. A: Thanks.

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A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

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A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

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Rebecca Black's new album.

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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why does the octopus have no friends? because they're anti social by nature

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clamidia

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a fat girl walks into McDonalds....

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A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian says "I'm worried about your book choice, maybe you should consult a theropast".

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How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

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Why do Jews hate hitler? They are jealous of him.

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why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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i like pie

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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QUESTION: Why do black people do so poorly in school? ANSWER: Some statistics point to genetic disparities in intelligence between races, but others say it is due to more complicated social factors.

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What did the genie say to the frog? Go home.

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And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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