Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

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What’s brown, sticky and smells like poo? Shit!!

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

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i like pie

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clamidia

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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Why was billy sad because in the morning he witnessed his mom get stabbed in the throat repeatedly by a clown then he saw the clown in the cop car but his mask was off and it turned out to be billys dad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops