I told my doctor I’m the first man on the face of the earth to suffer from morning sickness. He promptly corrected my mistake; my excessive vomiting is actually caused by chemo.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans at the bottom of the ocean? Cuatro sinco.

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What do you call a white guy in a joke? The first joke to specify one of the people in the joke as one with Caucasian origin.

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If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

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Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? My arm! My arm who? My arm is everywhere!

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I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

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Who is Jim Wonderbread? A whorrible person

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if you want to see somthing funny, throw a small child imbertween two catholic priests!

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Why did Billy fail his math quiz? Because he's stupid.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Marla should be home by now, it's nearly 6." He was unaware he had lost his tractor until the next morning.

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A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

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whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

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What happens when you yank on someones nuts? They cry

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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Q- Where did Sally go during the explosion? A- Everywhere!

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What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

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What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

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-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

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well now

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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