A man called the police and was later arrested for murdering himself,

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if life gives you the back.. TOUCH HER ASS

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

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Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Why did nobody like Anne? She was disabled

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Girls Lacrosse.

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How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

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what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

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your no better than a cockroach

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Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

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what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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Q: Why do homeless people smell bad? A: Because they live on the street and they dont take showers it's very sad sometimes.

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is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My heart skipped a beat, I'm dead.

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What is white and smells like wood? White painted wood

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what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

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An American, an Indian and an African walked into a bar. They had a memorable time together.

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kk

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Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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