What do you call a black man and an Asian at a school? Two hard-working, dedicated teachers.

Why were there bones on the moon? The cow diden't make it.

A baby seal walks into a club.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

Patient: Doctor Doctor! Every Time I Drink Some Tea, My Eye Is Really Sore! Doctor: Next Time Take The Spoon Out...

Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

a dumb blond walks into a hair salon and gets her hair died brown... she is now a dumb brunette

Why did Timmy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in face! Why didn't she get back up? Because she didn't have any friends!

How do you get out of editable poly? You don't.

Set up Punch line.

Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

Why did the asian man go to the bar with a black man? Because they both wanted to enjoy a few beers in the company of another.

It's yellow and when you press the button, it becomes red... A baby chicken in a blender

Your mama's so nice, she made me cookies once. And I enjoyed them.

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

True or false , is it hotter in the summer or in the city? False, because blue monkeys don't eat orangutan bones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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