Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

How do you kill a polar bear? Global Warming.

What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

Actually, Red Bull helps temporarily restore wakefulness when experiencing fatique or drowsiness.

How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

A Jew walks into a bar, he buys it.

I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

Error 37.

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

Roses are Roses Violets are Violets I am to Literal, That is a statement.

if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

What's the funniest part of a tomato? The skin.

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your cousin. Kathy then let Jim inside her house and helped him carry the pizza boxes into the kitchen. Everyone had fun and enjoyed the party very much that night.

I'm going as the joker for halloween

When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

Why is meth so addicting? Why? Hang on, i gotta go do some meth

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

Whats worse than burnt toast? Getting molested

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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