- Anti Joke

Why was young Ferdinand sad? He had a very rough day. In the morning he woke up. To find a man in his room, and then the man raped him. Then, Ferdinand found out that his whole family was killed by an angry rat. Then, he realized his grandma took away all his Christmas presents and ate them. Then, the angry rat showed up and brutally murdered Ferdinand and ate him. The rat then burped up Ferdinand and his family's bones, and on Ferdinand's bone there was something wrong, indicating that Ferdinand had cancer and would've died the next day anyway. The rat then got cancer from Ferdinand, and it died. That is why Ferdinand was sad.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face"? The horse does not respond, because it is a horse and lacks any cognitive ability to speak or understand English. Instead, it becomes confused by its surroundings, takes a dump on the floor, and gallops out of the bar knocking a few tables over in the process.

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how do you make a little girl cry?? Kill her family

A gay man walks into McDonald's. McDonald's serves people of all sexualities.

when life throws you lemons you should watch out or you might get hurt.

Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

What is the first thing you should do when a person is choking? Make sure the person is choking How can you tell if a person is choking? If he's going like this: aaghh gaghhg agghhh gaghhhhh ghghaghghgh

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Accept for cancer.

Bob: If two negatives make a positive, what would be an anti-anti-joke? Tim: An anti-joke

Why did the child cross the road? Nobody knows, he forgot to look both ways got hit by a truck and suffered severe head trauma leading memorie loss.

Whats the difference between Tina Turner and dead babies? I have never fu*ked Tina Turner before.

They say "You are what you eat." In that case, I'm a pussy.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

What did the lesbian say to the hot dog? "nice to MEAT you" get it the hot dog is made of meat!

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

Why Didnt John Return any of his calls he was in a very serious car accident fell into a coma and will probablly will not wake up ever again

Crowded elevator smell different to midget-Confucius say.

hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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